


Back again.

by thewalkingdeadwrites



Category: Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-03-14
Updated: 2014-03-14
Packaged: 2018-01-15 18:20:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 11,591
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1314610
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thewalkingdeadwrites/pseuds/thewalkingdeadwrites
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Beth left everything behind two years ago. How will she handle being back home? Forced to deal with her past. Brought back face to face with the man she loves, can they leave the past in the past and start over? Bethyl AU. WARNING - contains possible triggers. Self harm and attempted suicide are talked about in this story.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Coming back home wasn't something Beth planned. She wasn't prepared to deal with her old life. Facing the things that made her leave in the first place wasn't something she knew how to do. Leaving her family and friends was hard, but leaving him was hell.

Sure, she called her family every couple of days and texted her friends, but the conversations never lasted long. Short conversations about how they were doing and how she was doing in school was pretty much the extent of the conversations. If she stayed on the phone any longer than that, the questions started. She always found an excuse to hang up the phone as soon as someone would ask her if she called him at all. The answer was always the same. No calls, no texts, no emails, nothing.

When she left two years ago that was it. The memory of their last conversation still haunted her almost every day. The look on his face when she told him she was done was forever burned into her memory. Even after two years of not seeing or talking to him, she couldn't shake the thoughts. It wasn't that she regretted leaving, because she didn't. But, living with knowing how fucked up things got nearly drove her insane.

The first couple of months after she left were the hardest. She barely left her room. Her phone hardly ever stopped ringing. Between her parents, siblings, and old friends, it was all too much.

The sound of her phone busting as soon as it hit the wall echoed throughout the small apartment she was staying in with her friend.

Krysta was her rock. From the first day she called her telling her things were bad and she needed help, Krysta was there. She booked Beth a flight the next day, and never left her side since. She stayed by her side through the nights she would wake up sobbing, the days she wouldn't eat or drink anything, and the times she wouldn't even talk and would just lay in bed and cry. Through it all, every step of the way.  
But now, she had to go home.

A phone call from her sister at three in the morning was all it took.. "Beth, mom needs you." was all she had to say before Beth jumped out of her bed and started packing her back. Leaving behind her new friends, her school, and her job.

When Beth came home, crying hysterically to the point no one could even understand what she was saying, her mom stayed up with her all night and just held her. Shawn was furious at the time. It took Otis, her father, and Maggie to make him calm down. Though, Maggie wanted to kill him too. She didn't even have to say anything.

Everyone in the town heard about Daryl's activities. It was all anyone talked about for weeks.

Everything was going so good until Merle came back. Then within the blink of an eye everything changed. Daryl wasn't the sweet man she fell in love with and was engaged too. No, everything was different. She spent three years with him, and within not even two months, things were too broken to repair.

It started off manageable.

Drinking here and there with Merle and not talking much. The few beers here and there quickly turned into going out every night and not coming home until five or six o'clock in the morning, if at all. Smelling like alcohol and being a bit more rough with her was something she wasn't used to, but she dealt with it. She always told herself as long as he never raised a hand to her, it was okay. The screaming at her, treating her like some girl he picked up off the side of the road, and acting like he owned her made her furious. But, she still bit her tongue. Even when Merle would make sexual comments at her, try to touch her when she was bending over, and even when he would tell her she was nothing but a piece of ass to Daryl. But the night Daryl came home at four in the morning, knocking everything over on his way from the front door to their bedroom, yelling for her, she'd had enough.

Beth finally fell asleep around midnight. Completely exhausted from the day she had. It was her fathers birthday, and they were having a party for him at the farm. After hours of begging Daryl to go, he finally agreed. She regretted it as soon as they got there.

He was drunk already, and he was acting like a complete and total jackass. She tried to stay by his side and keep him from saying anything that would piss anyone off, but when Maggie came to her side and pulled her away because she needed to talk to her, she told him she'd be back and went to talk with her sister. She couldn't have been in the house for more than ten minutes before she heard glass break and people yelling. Fear flushed over her as she ran outside. It wasn't clear what happened, but it didn't matter. Shawn was laying on the ground holding his nose, Daryl was being held back by some of her fathers friends panting, and the glass of Shawn's car window was completely shattered.

She ran to her brother, hovering over him in a panic. She was just too done with Daryl at this point to care what happened. He hit her brother, and that was something that she couldn't let go.

Her family was the only thing she had left anymore. Her friends started ignoring her after one too many times of Daryl telling her she couldn't go out with them. They'd all tried to convince her to leave him for months, but she wouldn't. She loved him too much, and she had hope he'd change. But now? She was regretting not listening.

She stayed by Shawn's side until Daryl started screaming again and the three men could no longer hold him back as he charged at Shawn. Without hesitation she stepped in front of her brother. Kinda weird, right? A small 110 pound girl protecting her brother from a man that was pushing 160 at least, and was stronger than her times a hundred. Daryl hardly noticed her in time. Hand raised in a fist as he charged over to Shawn. Her father and Maggie running over to Beth and Shawn when they saw what was happening.

Without a second to spare, Daryl snapped out of it. A second before his hand would've come into contact with her face. She could hear everyone's gasps around them, but her eyes didn't leave Daryl's. The regret in his eyes was only noticeable for a second before he stepped back, growling that they were leaving now. Everyone told her not to go with them, but she couldn't even imagine how things would go if she didn't. Daryl was already too pissed off right now, and she didn't wanna make it worse. Not when they were at her childhood home, surrounded by people.

Quickly hugging her mother, father, and Maggie, she whispered to them she'd be back tomorrow morning. She didn't get a chance to say anything to Shawn before Daryl roughly grabbed her arm and pulled her to the car. She refused to get in unless he let her drive though. The last thing he wanted to do was fight with her here, so instead of replying, he nodded and got in the passenger seat. Taking a deep breath to calm herself, she blew a kiss to her family.  
When she got in the car and started it; her heart was racing, her head hurt, her chest was throbbing, and she wanted nothing more than to jump out of the car and run to her family. But she couldn't, not now. The drive home was silent. She didn't know what to even say at this point.

A few tears made their way down her face, but she quickly wiped them with her hand that wasn't on the wheel when Daryl told her to stop being a pussy. She didn't even flinch when he got out of the car and slammed the door the second she stopped the car at their place. Slowly, she got out of the car and made her way to the door. Completely ignoring Merle and Daryl sitting on the porch smoking. Merle was drinking, and Beth knew it wouldn't be long before Daryl was again. She didn't even think about cleaning the house or cooking. She went straight to their bedroom, shut the door as quietly as she could, and crawled in bed. She laid there for hours before she fell asleep.

She shot up when she heard the front door slam against the wall, followed by glass hitting the floor. Daryl was screaming something about "Dumb judgmental christian bastards.". She thought maybe if she'd just lay there and not react, he'd stop.  
But, he didn't. It wasn't five minutes before he came in their room. He wasn't screaming anymore, but he was still pissed. That much was obvious. He just stood at the door, looking at her. Him not screaming scared her more than him screaming. She was more shocked when he climbed into bed and put his arm around her. She sighed and turned towards him. She was just about to say something to him when she noticed the red lipstick stayed all over his neck and jaw.

And alcohol wasn't all he had on him. The smell of cheap perfume was all over him, making her sick to her stomach.

Without warning, she pushed his arm off of her, jumping out of bed, with her hand over her mouth as she fought not only the urge to cry, but the urge to puke that was getting worse every second. This was the one thing she wouldn't ever forgive, and he knew that. Cheating was something she made perfectly clear to him that she wouldn't deal with, ever.

"The fuck is wrong with you, girl?!" Daryl spat at her. She couldn't even think about what to say to him, so she didn't say anything at all. Instead she just started grabbing some of her things from the dresser and tossed them into her bag she pulled out of the closet. She could hear Daryl faintly calling out for her, but she couldn't even think about anything other than that smell. It took over every thought she had. Focusing only on the clothes she was tossing into her bag. It wasn't long before she had all she needed, and made her way to the front door.

Truthfully, Daryl had no fucking idea what she was doing. He was so pissed drunk he could hardly keep his damn eyes open, let alone pay attention to whatever she was fucking pissed about now. But, when she left the room he didn't think before he jumped out of their bed and went after her. Him ignoring her only pissed him off more, and she knew that.  
Grabbing her arm tight as she went to open the door, he pulled her so she was looking at him. "where the fuck are you goin'?!"

Ignoring him, she tried to pull her arm out of his grasp. Pointless however. She wasn't strong enough to pull away from him when he was serious. "Let go of me! I'm done!" she screamed, pushing on his chest.  
Her words made Daryl feel like his heart was snapping in two, but he'd never say anything like that. Merle taught him better than that. Girls were nothing more than a quick fuck. He wasn't supposed to care if she was done with him, but he did. More than anything, it just wasn't who he was to tell her that.

"Fine! Fuckin' leave! The fuck do I care?" he yelled, letting go of her arm, taking a step back. Despite his words, the look on his face said it all. He didn't want her to leave, but right now she just didn't care. Too much had changed for her to stay, she couldn't any more. His eyes were locked on her, and the ring on her finger. The day he asked her to marry him seemed like a lifetime ago now.

His words completely broke her now. She wasn't even trying to hold back the tears anymore. It didn't matter, none of it did. Without hesitation, she turned and walked out of the house. Her hands shaking beyond belief as she carried her bags in one hand, keys in the other. It was getting hard to breathe again, but she was determined to keep going. She wouldn't turn back and run to him. Not this time, not after everything, nope. After tossing her bags in the trunk, she took one last look at where he was standing between the door of the house.

Their house. The house they picked out together. The house they planned on living together for the rest of their lives.

Forcing herself to get in the car, start it, and leave was harder than she thought it would be.

Leaving him beyond was the hardest thing she had ever done, but she had no choice.


	2. Ache.

Two years.

Two years without having Beth by his side.

Two years of missing her more than he could ever put in words.

He knew it was his fault, and he blamed himself every damn day for her leaving, for breaking her heart, for all of it. Every time he heard a car drive by, every time his phone would ring, and every time he'd hear heels when he was out in public, he hoped it was her. It never was.

If he was being honest, he couldn't hardly remember anything that happened for the next two months after she left him. His days were the same. Drink, smoke, drink, sleep, repeat. His days only consisted of drinking, smoking, sleeping, and trying his hardest to forget Beth by hooking up with some random girl. Though, it never worked. He only felt worse after he'd finish, pull up his pants, and make his way to the door without saying a word to whatever girl he was with that night.

Losing her changed him, just not for the better. He was an even bigger asshole now. Hardly even talked to Merle these days. Merle came by a couple times a week, but Daryl always ignored him. It all started when Merle came back from one of the many times he was in jail. But, not all of it was Merle's fault. He was the one who made the choice to follow whatever Merle said, he wasn't forced to. He just did it because Merle was blood, and to him that mattered more than anything else back then.

But, things were different now. One of the many nights he found himself sitting at the local bar, getting wasted, and trying to pick up a random girl with blonde hair that looking at him, Hershel showed up..

Everyone in the town knew how tense things were at the Greene farm. With everything that happened the night of Hershel's party, everything with Beth, and the tension between everyone in the house, he wasn't shocked to see Hershel there. Hershel had done pretty good at staying away from the booze for years, but everyone slips up now and then, right?

Except for the fact Hershel wasn't drinking this time. Instead, he walked over to Daryl and told him he needed to speak with him. All other thoughts in Daryl's head vanished, and worry took over. Was Beth okay? Was he coming to tell him that something happened to her?

He didn't hesitate one bit. With a simple nod, they walked out of the bar together. Daryl followed Hershel to his truck, and climbed in the passenger seat. Hershel was silent as he started the car and drove for no more than 15 minutes. But, when he stopped and Daryl looked out the window to see where they were, he didn't know how to react.

Hershel brought him to the one place he knew Daryl wouldn't walk away from if he got upset. The clearing in the woods where he asked Beth to marry him. Not until after very awkwardly asking Hershel for his blessing, of course.

"Come on, son." was all Hershel said to him as he got out of the truck. Daryl watched as Hershel made his way to the front of the truck, and leaned back against the hood. Slowly, he got out as well, and walked over towards Hershel. Arms crossed as he looked over at the exact spot he remembered getting down on one knee in front of the woman he loved. It made him feel sick. He was ashamed of himself more than anything, and he couldn't even imagine how disappointed Hershel was in him.

"You're gonna end up killin' yourself, Daryl. You asked me on this day nine months ago for permission to marry my babygirl, you remember that day? You need to fix this, son. I don't know if she's coming back, but don't you think you owe it to yourself to try? Get yourself together. Stop drinkin', stop smokin', stop doin' what you're doin' with those girls. Everyone knows, you had to of known everyone would find out. Ya' haven't exactly been discreet about it. It's why she left, you know that. That why you're still doin' it? Think she'll come back to get you to stop? She won't. My little girl left because you broke her heart, and you need to make it right. You're family, Daryl. Always have been, even if I didn't like it at first. So, son, do it for her, do it for me, do it for yourself. I don't care why you do it, just do it." Hershel told him. His voice cracked as he spoke, and Daryl didn't even have the balls to look over at the man he respected and grew to think of as a father figure. His own wasn't ever there for him, but Hershel was. At first he wasn't too fond of the thought of his daughter dating a Dixon, but he took the time to get to know Daryl, and after everything, Daryl let him down. Hershel trusted him with his daughters heart, and he needed to fix it.

He nodded at the man standing next to him before he made his way over to the spot that he was sitting at nine months ago with Beth. They should be planning their wedding right now, but instead, she was gone, and it was because of him. Hershel was right, he needed to get it together. He needed to prove to Hershel he could change, and then he needed to show Beth the same thing. He needed to show her how much he loved her, and that he would do anything in the world to fix everything he fucked up.

To this day, a year and ten months later, not once has he had a drink. Since then Hershel helped him get his life on track. He stopped drinking, stopped smoking, got a job, fixed up the house that was falling apart from the lack of care, and now he spent most of his time at the Greene farm helping out. With Hershel currently going through something he refused to talk about with anyone and always being gone, Annette needed all the help she could get. Maggie was almost always with her fiance, Glenn, and Shawn was hardly ever home. With Beth gone, Annette was doing everything, and it was taking a huge toll on her. Without any warning, he showed up at the Greene farm first thing in the morning one day and went straight to care for the animals. That was over a month ago, and he was still doing it every day. Annette had told him several times she could do it, but he simply shrugged his shoulders each time and told her it was the least he could do.

Every morning at eight a.m., he was there starting out the day. He'd spend all morning there, then he'd go down to the shop he was working at currently for his shift, after that he'd go home, sleep, and repeat.

But today was different. Maggie, Shawn, and Annette were running around the house all day cleaning it up while Hershel was who knows where. Something was up, but he figured it was none of his business. He went on with his day like normal, fed the animals, cleaned up, made sure the yard was clean, and he even walked the horses around for a bit since he had time. He didn't work today, so he took extra time to tend to the animals. Only when he heard Annette walking to the barn did he stop. From the corner of his eye he could see Shawn and Maggie getting in her car and driving off, which was pretty odd since they had been cleaning all morning.

When Annette made her way to the barn and offered him some lunch before he had to get going, he surprisingly accepted her offer, which shocked her. She did this everyday, but he always declined politely and said he needed to get going. With a smile on her face, she motioned for him to follow her, which he did.

Reaching the door, he stopped to take his shoes off before he followed her inside. She didn't even have to remind him to clean up anymore. He excused himself from her presence and made his way to the restroom to wash his hands before he'd dare touch anything in her kitchen. He had too much respect for the mother of his ex fiancee to be disrespectful towards her, especially in her own house.

Passing the door to Beth's room made his heart physically ache. Missing her took a huge toll on him emotionally and physically. He only snapped out of it when Annette patted his back gently, and rested her head on his shoulder as she had her own kids in the past. "I miss her too." was all she said to him before wiping her eyes and walking back to the kitchen.

Yeah, he definitely missed Beth Greene.

So sorry this took so long to write! It's been a busy week, but depending on how you guys like this chapter, I'll be writing the next tomorrow. :)


	3. Chapter 3

Beth didn't even notice when the plane landed. She was too focused on the words she was scribbling down every second in her journal, page after page. It wasn't until one of the flight attendants lightly tapped her shoulder and told her it was time to start gathering her things because the doors would be opening any second, that she nodded with a smile and started putting her things back in her small bag.

She waited patiently until everyone was off of the plane before she stood up and opened the overhead to get her suitcase out. She didn't want to be bumping into anyone, and truth be told, she wasn't in a rush to get off the plane anyways. She was terrified of seeing her family again, even though she missed them more than anything. She had heard rumors from friends that Daryl was clean now, and that he and her father were friends, but she didn't want to talk about it with anyone. If she even asked anyone how he was doing, they started asking her if she was coming back, if she missed him, if they were getting back together, etc. She didn't want to deal with everyone in her business, unfortunately now it was going to be rather unavoidable.

She would be back in the same state as him, minutes away from where he lived, and they were bound to run into each other sooner or later. She just hoped it was later.

Since she already had her bag, she didn't have to wait at baggage claim. It was only about two in the afternoon, but it was pretty chilly. When she stepped out of the door, she shivered. She had completely forgotten about how cold it would be, since she was used to the weather in Florida where she had stayed for the past two years.

It was only a few seconds before she heard her name, pretty loudly might she add. Turning around, she grinned when she spotted Shawn and Maggie running to her. As soon as she saw them, she wanted to cry. Leaving her bag where it was leaning up against the brick wall, she ran towards Shawn and Maggie. Their arms were wide open, and she instantly threw herself into them, one arm around Maggie, one arm around Shawn. They both wrapped their arms around her, holding her to them tightly. The tears were now rolling down their face, and she was pretty sure Maggie was crying as well. Now that she was with them, she realized how much she really did miss them, and now more than ever before, she couldn't wait to be back at her childhood home with her family. It was where she was supposed to be, even if it would be hard to deal with at times. It would take some getting used to, but she could, it would just take a while.

The ride to the farm was quiet. She was sitting in the middle seat of Shawn's blue Ford truck, her head resting on Maggie's shoulder, as Maggie was silently humming along to a song on the radio, playing with her sisters long blonde hair. Shawn made sure to pat her back every so offend to remind her he was there too.

Shawn and Maggie were both fighting hard to keep a grin off of their faces. Neither one of them could wait to see the look on Annette's face when she saw Beth back home.

Yet, they had no idea Daryl was still there since he was normally long gone by now.

After eating lunch, Annette told Daryl he could stay as long as he wanted, and that she was going to take a nap because she wasn't feeling well. Daryl wasn't comfortable leaving her home alone, so he nodded and hesitantly returned the hug she had him wrapped in. It was comforting, though he wouldn't ever admit that to anyone. Even after she told him to leave the dishes there, he didn't listen. He wasn't going to leave a mess for her to clean up, especially since it only took him ten minutes at the most to clean up the few dishes that were dirty from the lunch she had cooked for the both of them.

He didn't know what to do once he finished the dishes. Everywhere he looked in the house reminded him of Beth, and it was really starting to get to him after awhile. He was still so angry at her for leaving, but mostly he was just angry at himself for being the reason she left. He made his way to the door of her room that was now shut thanks to Annette. Standing outside of the door, he chewed on the corner of his thumb as he stared at the doorknob.

He knew he was allowed to go in there, Annette told him that herself, but he was terrified of actually going in there. Her things were still where he remembered, and the smell of her perfume was so faint now that he could hardly even recognize it anymore. When he finally opened the door, he quickly made his way in the room, and shut the door behind him quietly, not wanting to wake Annette up.

His eyes flickered from her bed, to her dresser where several photo frames were still sitting on top of. One was just of her at her high school graduation, smiling so big it made his heart hurt. He hadn't seen that smile in so long, he'd almost forgotten what it looked like. The other made his fists tighten. It was of the two of them on one of his birthdays. He had a beer in his hand, sitting on the opening of Shawn's truck, and Beth was sitting on his lap kissing his cheek. He was never one for pictures, but she was. She wanted to capture every moment of them together for the photo album she started, which he still had at his house. It was one of the many things Hershel brought over to him after he got cleaned up. He'd had it for quite sometime now, but he still couldn't bring himself to open it up.

He sat down on the bottom of her bed, brushing his hand over the soft comforter that was on her bed.

The memories shared between the two of them drowning out all other thoughts, he didn't even hear when Shawn's truck pulled up.

Beth's heart was racing as they pulled up to the farm. Thankfully, when Shawn parked the truck and turned it off, neither him nor Maggie rushed her. They let her take her time to let herself get used to the thought of walking back into the house before Maggie opened the door and stepped out, so Beth could get out of the truck as well. Maggie gave Beth's hand a gentle squeeze and told her she was going to call Glenn and then she'd be right back, which Beth just simply nodded to.

Beth watched as Shawn got out of the truck as well and walked to the back, opening up the hatch to get out Beth's suitcase.

As soon as Maggie walked away from Beth's side, the blonde started walking up to the door of the house. She hesitated as her tiny hand gripped the doorknob, but quickly twisted it slowly, and opened the door.

As soon as she stepped inside, the smell of lavender washed over her, making her smile. Everything was still the same in the house. From where the pictures were on the wall to the furniture in the house, it was all the same.

When she noticed the first door to her room slightly cracked, she walked over to it. She was totally unaware that her mother had no idea she was coming home, so she just thought it was her mom cleaning up her bedroom like she had many times before when Beth would come visit her family and stay the night when she was living with Daryl.

As soon as she opened the door, her eyes searched over the room until they met the eyes that were staring back at her. A her hand moved to cover her mouth as she took in a deep breath in shock, her eyes never leaving his.


	4. Chapter 4

The second their eyes met, it felt the same way it did years ago, before everything got so screwed up. After two years of not seeing each other, their reactions were absolutely unpredictable.

Beth had known she would eventually run into Daryl if she came back home, but she didn't think for a second that it would be the day she got home, and she surely wouldn't have ever thought their reunion would be at her house. But, it was. They were right in front of each other and neither of them had any idea what to do next. It didn't feel real, honestly.

The memories shared between the two ran through both of their heads when they were brought face to face once again. The memories from the first day they met, all the way up until the last day they spent together.

Both of them wanted to say something, anything, but neither of them knew where to start. He looked healthy and Beth was definitely happy to see that. The day she left him he looked horrible. He was so wasted, he looked exhausted, his clothes were ripped, and he hadn't showered in a few days. But now? He looked so amazing it took her breath away. His hair was longer now, his clothes fit him, he looked clean, well rested, and she was pretty sure his arms had doubled in size. She couldn't help but stare at him. Two years without seeing him ate at her every single day, and the only thing she wanted right now was to have him wrap her up in his arms. She couldn't even remember what it felt like anymore.

Before Merle got out of jail, she spent every night in his arms, and woke up in them every morning. Though Daryl would never admit it, he couldn't go to sleep without her in his arms back then. He wasn't good at talking about how he felt, but every single night; he pulled her into his arms, played with her hair with one hand, had the other arm wrapped around her, and their legs tangled together the second their bodies touched. She always fell asleep so quickly when he played with her hair, but she could still feel him every night when he kissed the top of her head before he made sure their blankets were completely covering his fiancee.

Looking at Beth again made everything hit him at once. The last time he saw her she had tears continuously streaming down her face, and she was screaming at him. She had all the right in the world to scream at him, and even more right to leave him and never look back. Which is exactly what he thought she planned on doing, but she was back at her home now, and she looked just as shocked to see him as he did to see her.

He had dreamed about seeing her again more times than he could count and now he was looking right at her. Her hair was longer than it was when she left. The tank top she was wearing had a thin sweater over it, she had jean shorts on, boots, and her beautiful blonde hair was down. She looked just as breathtaking as she always had. His eyes felt glued to her, or maybe they were simply glued to her hand. The ring on her finger made his chest tighten, but the scar that was so clearly visible brought the worst possible pain to his chest.

All of the air in his lungs felt as if it were knocked right out of him and he didn't even know what to say. He felt so many ways right now, but more than anything he just hated himself more at this moment than he ever had. He'd spent the last two years blaming himself for her leaving and hating himself for it, but he never knew what she had attempted to do to herself. When he found out she was leaving, that was all he found out.

He was getting coffee one morning at the local diner in town after a long night out with Merle and he had the worst hangover he probably ever had in his life. It was only a week or so after Beth had left him, and when he woke up he still looked over at the opposite side of the bed to wake her up, only to be reminded that she was gone. He was pouring a sugar into his coffee when he overheard a conversation between Glenn and Jimmy about Daryl and Beth from behind him. His first instinct was to turn around, grab both of them, and teach them a lesson in why they needed to mind their own goddamn business, but he didn't get the chance. Before he could turn around, he heard Glenn tell Jimmy that Beth was leaving the next day. Hearing those words blocked out everything else, and only faintly could he hear Glenn saying how upset Maggie was over the youngest Greene moving away.

The truth hit him harder than anything ever had. Her heaving destroyed him, but he so desperately held onto the illusion she'd come back to him after she calmed down. Now he knew that she was leaving, and everything else seemed so pointless.

Now, looking at her wrist he didn't think before he reacted. Before she could even process what was happening; he was up off her bed, standing right in front of her, and he was gripping her wrist almost too tight in his hand. It shocked her to say the least. She was too caught up in thinking about how things used to be, she didn't even notice that he moved until he already had her wrist in his hand. She was just about to ask him what his problem was and tell him to let go of her, but he spoke first. He wasn't going to give her a chance to pull away from him or give anyone else the chance to come in before he got an answer to the question that was nearly drowning him.

"The hell did you do it for?"

It was barely more than a whisper, but she heard. His voice cracked when he spoke and it made the tears that had been welling up in her eyes finally spill over. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. She attempted to to tell him to let go of her, but he quickly took her other wrist in his free hand and told her to look at him. Much to both of their surprise, she did.

She looked him straight in his eyes and he knew. She didn't have to tell him, but he wanted to hear it. He needed her to tell him it was his fault, needed her to tell him to get out and never come back. He just needed her to talk to him. He needed to hear her voice so desperately it hurt.

She tensed when she heard the front door open and she blinked away the tears. She thought Daryl would instantly let go and step far away, but he didn't. He didn't pay any attention to the sound of the door, or the sound of Maggie and Shawn calling out for Beth. His eyes were locked on hers, and hers were locked on his.

"Beth! Did you find mom ye-" was all Shawn managed to get out before he and Maggie looked in Beth's room. The gasp that escaped Maggie pulled Beth back into reality straightaway. Her siblings were obviously right behind her now, but Daryl still held onto her. Truthfully, he was too terrified to let go. He was so scared that all of this was a dream and if he let go of her hands, he'd wake up. Although, he didn't have much of a choice when Shawn pushed through the doorway and put his hand on Daryl's shoulder. Daryl was able to understand why Shawn reacted so quickly; considering the last time Beth and Daryl were together at the farm, he beat Shawn and ended the night with Beth leaving him, showing up at the Greene farm near morning time, still sobbing.

It was with much difficulty that Daryl tore his eyes away from Beth and looked at Shawn. The hurt Daryl was feeling was so visible, Shawn noticed it as soon as Daryl looked at him. But still, Shawn told him to let go and step back. It wasn't loud or anything like he deserved it to be. Instead it was in a very calm and quiet voice. When Daryl didn't react straightaway, Shawn pressed gently on Daryl's shoulder to remind him to let go when he looked back at Beth.

Daryl simply nodded and dropped his hands back to his sides, but his gaze was still on Beth, as was hers on him. Maggie was now standing right beside Beth, arms wrapped around her younger sister, pulling her to her, but her eyes were locked on Daryl. It was reasonable for the both of them to be nervous of Daryl hurting Beth, after all he was the reason she left, but every pair of eyes in the room snapped over at the door that led to the hallway when it opened.

Beth immediately pulled away from her sister and all but ran across the rooms, straight into her mothers open arms. Annette was more than taken back by her daughter being back in her arms that it took her a moment to react. Slowly but surely, she wrapped her arms around her daughter, holding her youngest child to her tightly. It had been so long since she felt her mothers embrace, it only took her mother brushing down her hair to completely break down the wall she was barely holding up at this point. It had been slowly tumbling down since she first got the call from Maggie telling her their mother needed her daughter back, and it took several severe hits when her eyes met Daryl's, but now it had completely collapsed. She didn't even care that the other three in the room were watching as she clung to her mother like a young child, crying into her arms.


	5. Chapter 5

Shawn, Maggie, and Daryl all three watched the reunion between Beth and Annette the entire time Beth clung to her mother, crying into her shoulder. but, as soon as Beth pulled back from the hug, Daryl turned to make his way out of the house. He felt extremely uncomfortable being around anyone when they were upset, but this was more than that. His ex fiancée just walked back into her house where he was after two years. Two years without any contact, and now she was back home. How was he even supposed to feel right now? Because he sure as hell had no idea. The only thing he was sure of at this point was he needed to get far away from the Greene farm, but that was easier said than done.

Annette calling out for him caught his attention and brought him to a stop just before he could open the screen door. Cursing under his breath, he turned around to face the woman who followed him. Didn't she have other pressing issues to deal with? Her daughter showing up was obviously only a shock to himself and Annette, since Maggie and Shawn were obviously the ones who brought her back there. But still, he took a breath to keep his voice calm. He respected Annette too much to snap at her in any way when none of this was her fault.

"Where are you goin', Daryl? Won't you stay for a while? I'll be fixin' dinner soon! Remember, I told you yesterday I was gonna make you your favorite. Can't bail out on me now, son."

And even with how upset he was, he couldn't bring himself to turn her down. She was right. He told her yesterday he'd stay over since she ever so nicely offered to make a big deal out of his upcoming birthday by making him an early birthday dinner, even though he told her his birthday wasn't for three more days. The smile on her face was bright enough to light up the whole house. The poor woman had been through hell and back with everything going on at the farm and with everything with Beth. The least he could do was sit down with everyone for a half an hour if it kept that smile on her face.

"Mmhm. Just gettin' some air. Don't worry 'bout it. I'll be right outside. You holler if you need me."

He couldn't help but tense up as she pulled at him for a hug in her mothering way she'd done so many times before. It was just how he always reacted to anyone touching him, and she understood that. She waited until he untensed, and patted her back before she let go. Giving him a smile before she turned around and walked back to Beth's room.

Numb was the only word she could thing of. Daryl's words played on repeat in her head as she sat down on her bed, legs crossed, running her thumb over the scar on her wrist. She felt like a child who had just gotten caught with their hand in a cookie jar. At first, seeing him again felt like the most wonderful thing in the world. But now? Now everything was rushing back. All of her anger, all of her sadness, everything. Every memories from every fight, every night she waited up for him, everything. It was all rushing back, and she was drowning in her thoughts. If it was only the bad memories, she could handle it. She could lock it back in that box she kept it in for the past two years. But, it wasn't just the bad stuff. The look in his eyes brought back so much more than just that.

The day they met, their first kiss, their first time, their first dance at prom after having begged him for days to go with her and him refusing, only for him to show up in a pair of jeans and a button up shirt that matched the colour of her dress, the first time he took her for a ride on the bike, the first night they spent in the back of his truck, pulled over in an open field watching the stars after a post graduation bonfire, their first night together in their house they spent months picking out because Daryl kept telling her he didn't give a damn about picking the perfect place, the first time he apologized after they had their first fight in their new house and picked her up off the kitchen floor where she sat for over an hour with her knees to her chest, the day he very awkwardly asked her to marry him, all of it.

She was only pulled away from her thoughts when her mom sat down on the bed in front of her and took both of Beth's hands into hers, smiling at her. Looking up from her lap, she noticed Shawn and Maggie standing to the side obviously unsure of what to do. This was not their plan at all, she knew that. She forced herself to smile when she looked up at her mother. She looked so happy, and the last thing the blonde wanted was to upset her mom.

"Well, lets get to it, all! Shawn, take your sisters clothes down to the laundry room so I can wash them after dinner, please. Maggie, would you go get the special dinner plates from the box in upper cabinet? Enough for all of us, and Daryl. We're supposed to be celebratin'! Why are we sittin' around? Bethy's home and Daryl's birthday is only a few days away! Lets get to it! I'll start on dinner, and you can come join us after you talk to Daryl, Bethy." Annette spoke, standing up with a grin plastered on her face. Until Maggie pushed herself off the wall she was leaning on, standing up straight with her hands on her hips.

"Daryl? This is Beth's day. Tell him to go! Why in the world would you ask him to stay? She doesn't need to be around him, you know that!" Her older sister spoke up, going right back into her protective sister mode. If it were anybody else in the world Maggie was snapping at, Beth would've been thankful for it. But this was her mother, and she was sick. If Daryl having dinner with them made her mom happy, she'd deal with it. She wasn't even fully aware of the extent of her mother's condition yet, but the rumors about Daryl helping her mother out were obviously true, and that meant something. It meant a lot, actually.

"Maggie! Stop it. I can speak for myself. I've done it for years, or have you forgotten that? That sounds good, momma. You go ahead and start, I'll be in there soon." She said, standing up off her bed, giving her mother's hand a gentle squeeze along with a smile. Annette smiled at her daughter before she left the room, giving Shawn a hug before she left the room completely. Beth made sure she was in the kitchen before ran her hands over her face, wiping her cheeks first, then brushing her hair back. Stressed out would put it lightly now. Everything was happening way too fast for her liking, and she was starting to panic inside. She seriously had to not only have dinner with her ex fiancé after not seeing him for two years, but she also had to go outside, face him completely alone, and have a conversation with him? It wasn't something she wanted to do at all, but Daryl made her mom smile and he was doing a lot to lessen the work load on her mothers shoulder.

She could handle a conversation.. Right?


	6. Chapter 6

"Suck it up, Beth. You can handle this." she reminded herself as she stood outside of the barn. Heart pounding in her chest and her stomach in knots when she stepped inside, eyes immediately searching over the place until they spotted him.

"Know you're good and all, but there ain't no way you're already finished" Daryl spoke, still looking down at the mower in front of him that he was attempting to get up and running again. A slight smile appeared on Beth's face when Daryl spoke, obviously thinking it was her mother that was approaching him, rather than his ex fiancée.

"Yeah, she is pretty great." she responded, her voice barely above a whisper. Hands tucked in the pockets of her jeans, walking closer towards Daryl, chewing on her bottom lip nervously. This could very easily go several ways.

1\. They could scream at each other until they both turn blue in the face.  
2\. Daryl could ignore her all together and leave, causing Annette to be upset.  
3\. Daryl could completely let her have it.  
4.  
Well, no. That about covers it. There was pretty much no chance of this conversation ending well, not after everything that had happened.

Maybe, just maybe there would've been a small possibility of a calm discussion if she wouldn't have left, but it was highly unlikely. The fights were one thing, but he had crossed a line that she was unable to get past back then. Shit happens, really. It wasn't like any of that mattered anymore, right? She left, he moved on, end of discussion.

Yeah, not so much.

He tensed up entirely when her voice spread across the large barn, filling his ears with the soft sound he'd dreamt about time after time again. Knuckles turned white as he clenched his fists, not daring to look up at her, eyes shut tight. All he could picture was seeing the scar straight across her wrist. He didn't wanna talk, maybe that was the problem all along. If he would've talked to her and worked everything out before things got so out of control, maybe none of it would've happened. He could sit around all day and think of every 'what if' possibility, but it wouldn't do him any good. He'd come to accept her leaving, but now she was back, and it was as if all of that fucking progress of getting used to her being gone was thrown out the window. There was no denying that Daryl Dixon was still completely in love with Beth Greene, even after all the bullshit.

"I like it. What you've done around here, I mean. It looks nice, cleaner." Silence.

"Momma wanted me to come talk to you before I helped her cook, soo." Silence.

"Are you hungry? Maggie's setting the table up already. Momma had her set you a plate too." Silence.

"Well, alright.. Thanks for uh, everything you've done to help her out since I wasn't here to help. See you inside?" Finally he looked up, biting down on the side of his thumb. When he didn't respond she started to turn away, and that's all it took. Seeing her walk away from him n.

"Yeah, ya' weren't here. I was. I helped her out while you were off runnin' around somewhere with your fancy high heels, overpriced coffee, and your dumb fuckin' friends, havin' a real laugh." Okay, it was harsh and wasn't his place to say anything at all, but it just spilled out. And once it started, it was like he couldn't stop it. Even when she turned around to face him and he saw the hurt in her eyes, he just couldn't shut up. He was angry, he was just so angry with her. Mostly he was angry that he missed her so much and the only thing he wanted to do was take her into his arms and never let her go.

"Ya' just ran off and left her here, left 'em all here! Ya' didn't care one bit. While your pops was runnin' around like a chicken with its head cut off! He did everythin' he could for her, but all she wanted was her fuckin' daughter. You just left her, and ya' broke her heart. Ya' even care about how many times she sat in your room, just cryin' because ya' left? Fuckin' blamed herself for you runnin' off. Guess she should've seen it comin', probably should've too. Always thought Merle was full of shit, sayin' you'd run off and leave me behind. Hell, told him time and time again ya' weren't like that, but he knew better. Fuckin' stupid."

She could practically hear Merle laughing in the back of her head. He tried so many times to poison Daryl against her, but it never worked. Even if he went along with Merle and followed him around like a lost dog, listening to every word he said, he never believed anything he'd say about Beth. Never once did he give it any thought, and even up to this very moment, he still didn't. He wasn't trying to hurt her, wasn't trying to be the jackass he truly was, it was just how he dealt with things. He'd either brush it off, or be a total dick about it.

Tossing the wrench in his hand to the ground beside him before he walked away, past Beth shaking his head angrily. But, she caught his arm and the feeling of her touch on his skin was the only reason he stopped. Years without her touch, and it only took her grabbing his arm to make him pause, and the anger to simply start to fade away. She always did that to him. She'd hook her arm around his or lock her arms around his back until he calmed down, but this was different. This wasn't her trying to calm him down, this was her silently demanding that he stop and listen to what she had to say, which was definitely something new. She never was one to stand up for herself and fight back, but she was truly pissed. She'd been blaming herself non stop for the past 48 hours, but hearing the words come from his mouth was more than heartbreaking. It was infuriating.

How dare he put all the blame on her, after everything he did? How dare he use her mothers feelings and use them against her just to get out his own pent-up emotions?

"I left because of you, you jackass! Don't you dare use her for your own personal use! You wanna blame me, go right ahead, but don't you dare for one second act like you're yellin' at me because you care oh so much about how my leavin' affected my family. You're yellin' at me because you're afraid to just come out and say you're mad I left! You're mad I walked away and did somethin' with my life. You think it was easy for me? Easy to leave my friends, my family, my home? Easy to leave you? It wasn't, but you made me! You picked Merle, that's on you! Hurtin' my family will always be somethin' I regret, and that will always be on me, but me leavin' you isn't just on me! I t r i e d. You didn't. If I remember correctly, you were the one who told me to leave. Asked me why you cared. So b a c k off! I'm tryin'."

The memory of her leaving played in both of their minds. Her telling him to let go of her, her saying she was leaving, pulling away from him, him yelling at her, telling her to just go, her walking out the door, every bit of it. He didn't mean it when he told her to leave, but her walking away from him was killing him, and he said shit he didn't mean. He always did that, and he just did it again.

A tear filled Beth tried to push her way past Daryl, but he wasn't having it. Even though he couldn't put the words together to respond to her, he couldn't stand to watch her walk away from him.

Taking her wrists in his hands yet again, he pulled her to his chest by her wrists. He'd be lying if the thought of kissing her didn't cross his mind, but he fought it off.

"Ain't done talkin' to ya'."


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, guys! It's been months since I've been on here, I know. A lot a lot a lot of shit has happened, but I've had a lot of motivation the last couple days to write. sooo, here you go! Beth Greene deserved better than what TWD gave her, and the writers on this website and every other site, her fans, the fans that rp her, and anyone else that supports her can give her happiness she truly deserved. xoxo
> 
> Review and let me know what you think? (:

Truth be told, Beth felt like she was suffocating. She was so close to breaking all together, she didn't think she could handle another outburst from Daryl- not that he gave her a choice since he grabbed her and pulled her back to him.

The tears in her eyes were so close to spilling over and she hated it. She hated feeling so completely weak in front of him- and he knew it. His grip on her wrists were tight and he could feel the bumps of the scars so easily it made him sick. No one had ever told him what she did to herself, not that he probably would've believed him. His Beth was the light in the dark, the hope that eased his fears, the love that made him change, and to think that she had done such harm to herself because of him? It was the most pain he'd ever felt. It was worse than her leaving. Her leaving meant she was moving on from the hurt he'd caused her, but her hurting herself was so much more than he ever thought she'd do. He knew she loved him, and he knew he hurt her, but he didn't know that him hurting her would make her hurt herself.

There was something in her eyes, something deeper than he'd ever seen. Something that made him want to crawl into a pit as far away from her eyes as he could get, far away from the realization it gave him.

He didn't know why he did the things he did, not really anyways. He went out with Merle because Merle was blood, but there wasn't an actual reason for the things he did. The way he treated her, the things he did, the things he said to her, the way he made her feel about herself, there was simply no reason. Just like there was no reason for him to have went to some easy, skanky, blonde at the bar that night. No reason for him to have cheated on the woman he loved, the woman who loved him despite everything he'd already put her through. He knew the second he followed the girl out of the bar towards his truck that he needed to stop, needed to turn around and go home- go home to his fiancee. But- he didn't.

Something in his totally fucked up head told him that it was okay, that it's what he deserved. He deserved to do this to himself, continue living the life he had started. He hadn't thought about Beth's feelings that night, didn't think about the fact that she'd know what he had done as soon as he got home, he just didn't fucking think. He went and he fucked everything up- he knew that.

He knew he'd fucked up the second she pushed him away and jumped out of bed that night.

Knew when he saw her eyes as they landed on the hickeys and lipstick still smeared all over his neck and jawline.

Knew when she packed her things.

Knew when she left him.

But he didn't know just how fucked up he made things until this very second. Until he felt the scars left on her precious, soft skin he had felt under his own body time and time again.

The tears in her eyes had finally dripped down her cheeks, and then the tears just didn't seem to stop. Her eyes never left his, and she could feel his thumbs moving back and forth across her skin. It made her feel sick.

For the first couple of months after she stopped, she did everything she could to hide them. She was so ashamed, she didn't want anyone to ever see them. Even in the summer, she wore jackets so they were hid. It took a long time for her to ditch the jacket and throw on a tank-top. Going out in public in one for the first time made her feel completely lost. She could see the pity in peoples eyes everywhere she looked and she just wanted to run from it. She didn't want anyone's pity, she just wanted to stop hiding. So, she kept walking. She completed her store trip without anyone saying anything, despite how everyone seemed to look at her. She took it one day at a time. It was a week before someone said anything to her, and it completely took her by surprise. The young woman that hugged her came out of no where in the mall one day and walked right up to her. All she said was "we both made it." before the young woman with long black hair threw her arms around Beth in a tight hug, crying on her shoulder. Beth was doing the same, though. Her tears soaked the girls shirt and she held onto her as well. They stayed that way for awhile and everyone that passed by the two women stopped and watched the scene in front of them. Some people even made comments to people they were with, saying simple things like "look at how sweet that is. ", "they must be really good friends", etc. It wasn't until a group of obnoxious teenage boys stopped and shouted "lets see some lip action now!" that the two women broke apart, laughing even though they both still had tears in their eyes. That was the day Beth met one of the people she'd come to call family.

Daryl's intention when he grabbed her was to continue lashing out at her, to scream until he was blue in the face- but now, he just couldn't. Still holding eye-contact, and still holding onto her, he spoke softly to Beth. So softly that if their bodies hadn't been almost touching, she wouldn't of heard him at all.

" How many times did you do this to yerself? "


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now, I know this was a short chapter, but I promise to update soon. I know some of you probably won't like the things Daryl said to Beth- hell, I don't like the things he said, but it's what I feel he would say. Like I've said before to people, this is a slow-burn, but I promise Beth and Daryl will eventually fix things. :)

"How many times did you do this to yerself?" was such a simple, direct question. Yet, the answer left Beth choked up and silenced. There was no answer that would satisfy Daryl. She hadn't felt scared in a very long time, but in this moment, she did. His tight grip on her, the way he looked at her, his tone, it all brought back so many memories that she was nearly shaking. She'd been through so much after meeting the Dixons, good and bad. The bad just seemed to be more forceful in trapping her here with him.

She could've turned and walked away, should've turned and walked away. He would've let go of her if she told him to, she knew that. She also knew Shawn would come running if she so much as screamed. She wanted to. She wanted to scream- to tell him how much he fucked her up, the things she had done because of him, the things she tried because she wanted to forget him, forget how much she loved him, wanted him to hurt the way she did- but she didn't say a thing. She didn't walk away, she didn't react.

His question made the silence throughout the barn feel so much heavier than it needed to. She felt so small compared to him right now as he stood up straight, hoovering over her. Part of her was squealing inside over having him touch her again, over feeling his skin on hers once more. Oh, how she wished that part of her out weighed the anger she had for him.

" I dunno. Lost count along the way. Doesn't matter. "

The way his eyes went from showing guilt to becoming wide, filled with rage actually took her by surprise. The same way him pushing her away from him did. It had scared her, that was for sure. He didn't push her hard enough to make her fall, but it had an emotional impact rather than a physical- and he knew that one was so much worse. But, he also knew with everything that had started to hit him within the last hour, the emotional impact his push gave her was a lot better than a possible physical impact she could get if he kept her so close to him. He felt as if he was going to blow up from his rage.

However, it wasn't all directed towards her. He hated himself right now- he hated Merle right now, he hated that blonde girl from the bar whos name he couldn't even remember, he hated just about everything right now. He was lashing out all of his hatred right at her because she was the easy target- or so she used to be. Back when they were engaged and living at their place with Merle, she was. He could scream at her until he went blue and she wouldn't say a thing. She'd simply walk away and finish whatever task she was doing or she'd go to their bedroom and shut their door as quietly as possible, not wanting to upset him more.

But, things had changed. She wasn't that week girl he was engaged to, he just didn't know that. She'd changed, maybe not all for the best, but she had. The heartbreak she experienced, the pain of losing everything she knew to be good, the pain of leaving behind her family, the pain of what Daryl hda done to her, and mostly- the pain o loving him had changed her.

"Don't matter?! How can you stand there and say that? Act like none of what you did hurt anyone else?! Ya ran off and ya did this? I thought you were smarter than that- hell, r than that. The Beth I knew wasn't this w e a k, stupid girl standin' right here! That's what you are! Actin' like you're better than the ones you left behind cause ya ran off and did somethin' with your life. Yeah, sure looks like ya did somethin'! ran away and started slittin' your wrist? Hell, maybe everyone should try that, then they can be like you. Some spoiled, self-pitying, bitch!"

By the end of his outburst, he was inches from her face and was surely not expecting it when her hand raised and she slapped him across the face, hard as she possibly could. Her tears had finally fallen down her face, but the expression on her face was one of pure anger- no, that didn't even come close to covering it. There simply wasn't a word for how truly pissed off she was, how hurt she was. He'd said a lot of things to her when he was drunk years ago, but this was different. He had targeted her for his anger before as well, but this was a much bigger 'fuck you' of sorts. He had never made her feel so pathetic, so weak, so n before. There was a huge part of her that believed every word that he said, and that's what made it all the more painful. He was telling her what she already knew but would never say out loud.

He had taken a major step back after he hit her, hand rested on the side of his jaw she had slapped, his eyes matched with hers.

He could only whisper ' Beth ' when she threw a anger fueled ' fuck you, Daryl. ' at him and turned around to walk back to the house.

He just couldn't stop making everything worse.

As she was walking away, she could hear his loud curses and bangs as he punched the barn door and started kicking over everything in his sight, but she kept walking. She wiped off her cheeks and kept walking, only to spot her sister standing a few feet away, having heard everything. Maggie's eyes were filled with tears- but she didn't say anything. She only wrapped an arm around Beth and stayed glued to her hip as they walked up the steps to the house and went inside to help their mother finish cooking dinner.


End file.
